Fighting For Love .

Why am I the only one in the relationship fighting to keep it together no matter the arguement or the circumstance? It could be the smaller things, like the little arguements that doesn't mean anything that ends the whole relationship (or close friendship). I just want a man who is also willing to fight for the love we share, or potentially share. I want them to fight as hard as I do so it could be equal. If I could get the man to fight HALF as hard as me then our relationship would be 100% better.

I fall in love so easily. My heart is always on my sleeve. Why must guys be so blind to the beauty of love. Of course, I have my faults and insecurities but my belief of love has always been strong, until lately. I'm starting to beleive that real love is only in the books and fairy tales.

Tagboard .

It seems as though TagBoards are what's hot on blog so I decided to get my own. I kind of like it.

The Perfect Man .

Speaking for women that want the perfect man, I want him so bad right now. Every man tries to be the man you want them to be in the beginning, until they get used to being next to you. Then they stop surprising you, and they stop holding you the way you want to be held. They stop kissing you in cute places. Not a day goes by that I miss it. That's why I don't like being in relationships. I like meeting new guys because they are in the new stage. That stage where all they want to do is please you (not just sexually but in that cutsey mushy way lol).

I always miss the little stuff that's taken for granted ... like the small kiss on the forehead or a compliment every now and then. I just hate being the first one to initiate the little stuff. Like I have to be the one to wrap his arms around me. Why can't the guy just want to pull me close or just just give me a hug and linger a little bit. I know, I'm a hopeless romantic. That's exactly what it is, hopeless. I'm just a wishful thinker because no man is like the man I want. I just have to go on being the initiator. I can live with it...........I guess.

Sexy Me .

Here's a few pictures of me dressed up on Friday night (April 18, 2009). Click the picture to see the full size. I got cute as hell. I love it. (SO CONCEITED!!!!) I was loving myself Friday night. But tonight is a whole different story. I look a hot mess lol. But ANYWAY how you like the fit?

Cycle of Love .

"My gratified mentality whispers to my soul
My heart demoralized and now black as coal
Love smiles cunningly and bellows at my gate
This love cycle is reran to establish my fate"

I wrote this for myself. For you slow people, (lol) it basically means, even though my mind tells my broken heart no, I always give in to love even though it's not good for me. I'm happy to say I'm not doing that anymore but I can't say that I won't do it in the future. And I definitely wrote that from personal experience. It's hard to turn away from the one you love even though you know he's not good for you. I'm just so happy I had the strength because some women don't and I can honestly say that I understand why ladies.

Baby Bump .

Well one of my best friends since the sixth grade (she's 20 now) is having a baby!!! In our little social circle there's already a 1 year old boy (Little Marcus) from my other bestie, Courtney. But this one is going to be a girl! YAY! Auntie Tweety is going to SPOIL SPOIL SPOIL!!!! You know the baby stores always have cute girl clothes. Plus stores always sell them adorable ass baby Jordans lol. Anyway that's her and her little baby bump to the right. Hopefully they don't realy name her Rebecca, because then her nick name would be Becky. The only thing that runs through my head is from the ir Mix-A-Lot song, "Oh My God! Becky, look at her Butt!!" lol.

Chillen .

Here's a video of me and my friend A.R. It started off as me trying to take a picture with my phone but I didn't realize it was in camera mode so I just kept it rolling. It was just us talking shit and him starting to strip and us showing are stomachs off a little bit lol. Oh and no offense to Tasha. I only said fuck New York because he said fuck Florida.

Feels Good Being Me .

I love being me right now. I'm young with a lot of life to live. I would say what happened today but I'm not in fear of incriminating myself lol. Long story short, I went to my friends job and saw her and went to steakn' shake. Then I went to Brandon's house for a minute then I went to get my friend from a "situation" with her boyfriend. After that, I went to a park to the courts and was bored for a minute but after that I had a BLAST!!! I know it's boring to read but A LOT of people that know me know about my blog and maybe I should've kept it a secret from them then you'd get the JUICY stuff lol.

Pubic Wax .

So when I usually get my 'area' done I usually got with a small triangle but someone from my messageboard inspired me to go COMPLETELY bare. (Emily). There was a discussion about different styles and what not on there. So I decided to go baby bottom smooth yesterday. I must say that I love it .... Feels a lot more refreshing ... I think I'm going to stay bald down there for a long while. I love the feeling!!! lol.

The April Fool .

The folly mistakes
With dishonesty and deceit
My spirit broken
with anger and defeat
He's my weakness
so I'll evacuate and retreat

I made that little rhyme for the guy in my life who thinks I'm dumb. The ex-girlfriend is too much and you know it and yet she sticks around. I can't help my feelings towards the situation. You know the ultimatum, you may dislike it or get angry but it is what it is.